News of the 'Gate

24/10/00 Chop Gate Roller Stolen!!!

Dim-witted thieves recently struck in the normally tranquil environs of the Gate as some light-fingered so and so's made of with our cherished yellow, sit-on roller (above).  

The bandits apparently made off with the said item while Buck Landlord, Mark Burgess, was on his holidays. "I couldn't believe it, the thieving b*****ds", he said later.  He also added that the crooks had foolishly neglected to take the ancient, former Council, rollers starting handle.  It won't be easy to push-start, lads! 

Anyone with information regarding this most heinous crime should contact Stokesley Police or The Buck Inn.  Or, alternatively, if you know of a motorised cricket pitch roller going cheap we'd like to know about that too.

6/10/00  Maltby Crowned Champions reports Neil Stockton.

Maltby received their trophy at the League Dinner at the Blacksmiths Arms at Swainby after pipping favourites Broughton in the final round of matches of a tense and exciting season.  Maltby Mouthpiece and all-round 'good egg' Martin 'Taxman' Barber put all his years of public-speaking experience to work and entertained the gathered luminaries and players, except Broughton's only attending player, Mark Smith, with a rib-tickling speech that had 'em rolling in the aisles.

Other highlights were Broughton collecting another Runners-Up gong for the Gjers Cup which they lost to Crathorne but did manage to collect the 6-a-side trophy by way of consolation.  The Chop Gate ligging crew of Frank Rose, Mark Lane and yours truly enjoyed some convivial 'Chummy' behaviour with selected members of other teams, got stuck into the buffet (although Lane nicked all my sausages) and were amused by the pubs 'Multimedia' toilets.  A fine night overall!

For more match details and League Table follow this link.

11/8/00  Captain Falls On Sword After Heartbreak Defeat

John Holmes, Chop Gate's sterling skipper for many years, abdicated his throne today in the wake of the Clubs cruel defeat by Kildale  in the Semi-Final of the Dorman Cup  last night.  The Ginger Grinder found the trauma too much to bear as the Gates' season petered out in the dark at Stokesley.

In a short statement he said, "After collecting my thoughts I have decided I am resigning the Captaincy with immediate effect.  I know this puts you on the spot but I thought about it while I was holiday and for a collection of reasons I think it is best for me and team if we have a change of leader.  I have not enjoyed it this season (last

Neil Stockton will take charge of the team, supported by Mark Lane until the end of the season.  This is the second resignation of a turbulent season, following in the wake of Vice Captain Dave Austin who chucked in the post after only one game in charge as skipper.